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Q&A's

 1. What do you identify as and what is your sexuality?  
AL: I identify as a heterosexual trans male (he/him).
AA: I identify as a pansexual nonbinary (she/they).
2. Have you come out to your family? If so, how did you feel and what was your experience like?
AL: I've actually come out to my family twice. I first came out as a lesbian when I was in 5th grade. I wrote it on a piece of paper and left it on my moms' pillow because I was too scared to actually tell her. My parents strongly believed it was just a phase and it definitely took some time for them to accept it because of religious and cultural reasons but they came around. I came out again my sophomore year during our car ride home. I asked my mom how she felt about the trans community to ease into the conversation since I was nervous and then told her. It took a while for everyone to adjust as both my name and pronouns changed. Overall my experiences have been positive and I'm more than grateful to have been blessed with such accepting people in my life. 
AA: My experience wasn't so much "coming out", it was more of my mother finding out. I was in 7th grade when she found out about me liking girls. I was texting my girlfriend at the time late at night and during this time, my mom would check up on me to make sure I was sleeping especially on school nights. She walked into my room and got upset at me for being on my phone so late so she asked for my phone and my password to see what I was doing. The next morning her eyes were puffy, her face was red, and the sadness in her eyes was extremely noticeable. She questioned if I had anything I wanted to tell her but I continued dismissing this question because I was well aware it wouldn't bring either of us satisfaction. For about a month she stopped talking to me or looking at me the way she used to and for a while, I felt extremely neglected and unloved. She began drinking more than usual. Luckily, I had an accepting aunt who introduced her to new perspectives. After about a year, she finally accepted it and I can genuinely say there's a significant difference in the ways in which she responds or reacts towards my sexuality as well as my significant others. 
3. Have you ever felt anxious to publicly display your relationship due to negative reactions from others?
AL: No, never.
AA: I have actually. It was so engraved in my head that my priority should be to make sure everyone is comfortable. However, this affected me so drastically because I began suppressing my feelings and desires for the sake of comforting those around me rather than prioritizing my own happiness. 
4. Have you ever been discriminated against because of your gender or sexuality? 
AL: Thankfully I have not.
AA: I have not. 
5. What was the most difficult part of embodying who you truly are? 
AL: I think accepting it is the hardest part. It took a few years to identify the feeling that I've felt for so long. I've always known my body didn't feel like me but I wasn't aware of what that meant until I started looking into things. At first, I would wonder what people would say or think, but then I realized that I didn't need anyone's validation to become my truest self. 
AA: Personally, I think the hardest part was accepting it myself and not conforming to what people expected or wanted me to be. I didn't want to be looked at differently or treated any differently but I was so terrified of the reactions I would get. I soon realized that if I kept worrying about others' opinions, I'd never be happy with myself and that is something I couldn't allow any longer.
6.  Do you have any advice for those that are struggling with coming out or embracing their authentic self? 
AL: Definitely take it at your own pace. It's a process, spend time with yourself and figure out who you are. Your journey is your own and it's valid. Although it's scary, it's better than living as someone you have no connection to. 
AA: I strongly believe that you should practice being prideful in who you are even if the people around you give you many reasons as to why you shouldn't be. Be selfish, put your desires and happiness first. Remember that it's okay to not know. The only constant is change. So if your journey changes along the way, know that it is okay. You are under no obligation to have everything figured out. Carry out the things you want in your life because it's YOURS and no one else's. 

*Since the Individuals I interviewed wanted to remain anonymous, I put their intials rather than their full name. 
                                                                  

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